danger will roberts, warning, danger...

dear self,

please remember to be very careful about what you wish for. you just might get it. and remember, it may not be in the way you thought it would be. and that, well, that might just suck.

also, you can't change the world, situations, or a person's perspective. the only one you can change is yourself. so for once, shut up and get over it. no matter the cost.

love,
me

reminder to self: breathe

it's amazing how 36 hours 3 minutes can change your entire world.

i have to keep reminding myself to breathe. i find my jaw clenched and lungs full often throughout the day.

this road is far rockier then i had ever imagined.

breathe.

i have come to realize that promises can be broken by others then the one who made them.

my patience and tolerance levels are growing very thin.

i can't believe that any sane person would sign up for this. so what does that say about us?

breathe.

i am struggling to find god in this. i can't imagine the greater plan would involve this much pain.

i have so many unanswered questions. and no one has been able yet to ask the right ones.

i can't imagine this can go on. please. make this stop.

breathe.

back in the *online* saddle again....

so my computer caught a very nasty virus. 12 days ago aka the night before the first (of three) snowstorms we had here in VA.

that. really. sucked.

but i am back up and running - on a very nice, new, shiny computer that i heart. a lot. i am trying not to blame my computer problems on my dear friend erin however mine did seem to start the day after hers died ;)

things have been crazy. due to the excessive amounts of snow/ice we lost power for a week. so me, laurie, the two kids, and seven dogs went to stay with my mom and dad. we are so blessed to have them. i will say we did extremely well considering the tight (and tidy which was very hard to keep that way with the ALL the extra grand*kids*&*dogs around) living quarters, my dad's dementia, my horrible mood swings and re bout of diverticulitis, and my kids "special" needs.

we are home now. warm, well lit, and back online.

next post will be about the uber roller coaster we are on kid-wise. i can't believe i am still breathing. that which does not kill us can only make us stronger!?

looking on the brightside...

we are about to be snowed in. again. and by snowed in i mean 2 feet of snow on our doorstep. which VA just doesn't know quite how to handle. i am hoping to be able to leave the house again by tuesday! until then there will be lots of hot chocolate, family games, movies, and snacks in our future. did i mention they get to be snowed in here with us instead of taking their usual weekend trip? that makes it all bearable!!!